trying

1. had a long, hot afternoon sitting in the boiling sun for a football game that we didn't even win! the atmosphere was...fun for the most part. 
2. went to never ending pasta bowl night at olive garden with friends. it was so much food! but i didn't eat much during the day, so it wasn't as bad. i got three bowls and had leftovers from the last one. yummy carbs!
3. had a pretty boring night. we were all carb drunk and not into moving around much. then again, other people had fun but i just kind of sat there.

i'm trying to stay positive and trying to stay upbeat. i'll let you know how this goes...hope all is well for everyone reading this post. and this blog. thank you all for reading. i'll post better tomorrow when i'm feeling a little better.

lateness

1. so freakin' tired, this is unbelievable. have to wake up pretty early for the football game tomorrow too. but i'm excited!
2. having people over tonight for seven layer dip and cookies--let rock bottom friday begin! 
3. good day of classes; got out of italian early...again! and had a few participants to run before going back to the apartment to relax.

have to book my trip for the conference soon. i'm excited that october will be a busy month. staying busy is a good thing for me! i was kind of irritated tonight for a few hours but pretty much got over that when my friends came over. and i got to see friends from high school! that was fun. anyway, i've got to get some sleep before the football game and whatever antics are happening on saturday night. happy friday!

sono bionda!

1. long day of classes today, but my last class let out about 15 minutes early, so that was nice! and i didn't have much homework for friday so i got that knocked out quickly. 
2. finished mockingjay today! it was so so so good. and heartwrenching. but i won't spoil it any more! i want to go back and read them all very soon, probably over christmas break.
3. out to eat with my friends tonight; ladies' night is starting soon so i'm excited for that. i need some fun in my life right now. 

i've been the lamest blogger ever lately! someone asked me earlier why i had a blog and i explained the new year's resolution and how i wanted to make one that i actually stuck to this time around and he accepted it as an answer and gave the typical response of "oh, that's cool." but then i started to wonder why i really am doing this blog. it's been such a long time since i started this blog, or so it seems. i have to reacquaint myself with my reasoning. because sometimes it really is a pain in the ass to blog (as you can tell from my apologetic, short, lame blog posts). sometimes it just feels like a routine that i have to go through and a way to prove to myself that i can stick to a resolution. but then doesn't it seem a tad disingenuous to continue if my heart isn't in it? perhaps, but that's how spiteful i am. and stubborn. and determined. this is kind of like the italian homework i had tonight: describe yourself using adjectives you have learned so far. the ones i just used weren't on the list, unfortunately. anyway, i'm trying to be better about blogging. tonight was a semi-long post! i need to have more funny ones. maybe when i'm in a funnier mood. hopefully that will come soon!

let's fly away...

1. italian class today, a break during which i ate lunch and read for class/pleasure. then had lab time for two hours! boxing club tonight; it was hard, as always.
2. got stuff all worked out for my travel scholarship, i think. also got an email today about how i can apply for a travel scholarship for italy in the summer. that'd be nice!
3. you know i'm thinking you and your family...

don't feel much like talking tonight. i'm really tired and it's been a long day. lots of things are on my mind and most of them are stressful. i wish it were the weekend so i could just relax some and de-stress. but i'll keep on plugging and get through. i feel like i've been emotionally and mentally and spiritually boxed as well as physically.

destiny's child?

1. long day. lots of homework, three classes, some interpersonal stress to boot. i really enjoy all my classes though, so that is a definite plus. the one i was most excited about in the beginning of the year (history of genocide and the holocaust) will probably end up being one of my lesser favorites simply because of the time frame. but i like my southern lit class and my film and culture classes a lot. and italian, obviously.
2. saw some friends today i don't usually see. talked with my mom and sister and boyfriend. got ready for school tomorrow. skipped crossfit because it was supposed to be hella hard (like, squatting with people thrown over your back like a sack of potatoes and bench pressing people. that kind of hella hard). and i walked a fair amount today and was also still a little sore from boxing. i need to catch up on sleep, too.
3. buuuut what might prevent that sleep catch-up is the new book i started, mockingjay. i won't say anything in case people want to read it, but it's great so far! it's so easy for me to devour novels...why is it not that easy to read academic material?

being independent is important to me. it always has been and it always will be. i like to be strong, stubborn, and my own person. college has really helped me embrace that part of myself and to move away from the high school-y clique-ish mentality that so pervades life as a female. i care less now about trying to please everyone, especially if it means being fake, and just living my life to make myself and those i care most about happy. obviously i'm not turning into some sort of monster or anything, i just don't care as much about stupid drama anymore. reason number high-on-the-list i am not involved with greek life. i have really come into a state of happiness in these past several months and i'm overjoyed that college is suddenly turning into the time in my life when i figure out who i am like everyone told me. it just feels right and it feels good (although one part of my life is currently residing elsewhere). so these are good feelings and i get good vibes about this year. we'll see how it goes! so far i was right about 2010 being a great year, but there is still time for the universe to throw that in my face (ever superstitious!).

let's be real.

1. such a long day today, it was ridiculous. only had two classes but i had a quiz in one and the other one is a three hour class that meets once a week. and in between classes i had to watch two movies and read a lot and write a response. it's been crazy.
2. took a fifteen minute nap before boxing club. it was so hard, of course! but i think it'll be worth it for sure. going with friends makes it a lot better. 
3. have been working ever since i got back from boxing. still have to find time to take a shower and then finally get some sleep. ahhhh please let it be the middle of the week already. or better yet, the weekend!

i hate enablers. i was watching this show on drug addicts and got so angry about the families. they just excuse the addiction and make it seem not as bad as it is and continue the cycle of addiction. an addiction is inexcusable and totally beatable. it takes unbelievable will/determination/support. but families cannot be a copout for addicts. they cannot feel this sense of responsibility and loyalty when it is destroying the addict. that is unfair and horrible and will slowly ruin the addict's life. i know that i've never had to deal with an addict but it's just not fair how families perpetuate addiction because they don't want to be forceful or mean or harsh. but sometimes tough love is the best way to show how much you really do love someone.

laughing makes for flat abs

1. had the most amazing weekend ever. it was pure fun. 
2. left the beach today and came back to lots of homework and even more hilarious pictures. SUCH fun times; i love weekends; i love college; i love my life. 
3. have some homework to catch up on, but that is totally fine with me. i'm almost caught up, but will probably have to skip boxing club tomorrow night to get truly caught up.

my friends are so important to me. i spend so much time laughing and having a great time. there are definitely "circle of trust" moments as well. i am just in a great mood and had a great weekend. it's times like these that keep me upbeat and happy and not ruminating, although it is always on my mind. now it's time to buckle down for a new week! bucket list item: make presents for my friends.