ascension

1. happy easter!!!
2. beautiful service, delicious brunch, relaxing day. what a wonderful weekend i've had. 
3. back to school tomorrow; i've even been semi-productive and written a paper while home. 

i am all written out. this paper has sucked out all my energy. but i am almost finished with it, and i need to get sleep for the long drive back to school tomorrow. i am at the point now where it's getting more difficult not to repeat myself in my blog topics. even so, i know that lately i have had some failings of blog posts, especially on the weekends. so i'm going to try to do better! the easter season is about celebration and redemption, so that's what i should focus on tonight. i'm celebrating my family and the love i have for them. and i am also celebrating the love that my church family has for me and all the support they gave me as i grew up those 18 years in the church. i was blessed to have the experiences that i did in my church. it gave me something to hold onto when i was scared or doubting. my faith came to be represented by those church memories. as a kid, it's hard to know what religion is all about or why people need it so much. well, that's not so for some kids i guess, but it was true for me. i just knew parts of the book of common prayer by heart and knew the words that the rector would say every sunday--i still know those things today. i used to want to be a preacher so that i could heal people. but i have found a way of healing that suits me more, though the appeal of being a preacher is still there. but that is not a possibility anymore. and i didn't want any of the other stuff, just to lead services and talk to people. so it looks like i found another way to fill that need. but i can't imagine my life without the church, and thus find it hard to leave it behind. and maybe i won't, but i also know that for now i need to live my life without a structured church setting and just let my faith wander and see where it takes me.

bucket list item: buy a lottery ticket.