happy place

1. i. am. so. tired. i have to go to bed soon. physically and mentally exhausted describes my state. wasn't i supposed to feel rested after fall break?
2. i still have a lot of work but it was so nice having a family day today. and the ride back was fun because i had a friend along. 
3. 10 weeeeks.

finding my happy place. that is what i try to do when i'm feeling down. my home helps, as does being around my family. being organized and on top of my school work makes me feel happy. as does relaxing but those are not happening right now! i am about to just go to bed and sleep as late as i can before class tomorrow. and then prepare to work all day tomorrow. and boxing club tomorrow night (if i have time) will suck! it's been over a week since i've gone...get ready for soreness! hope everyone had a good weekend. bucket list item: make christmas cards for people.

f@#$ing football

1. did homework most of the day, but took some breaks to do random stuff. finished my book for my presentation on monday but i am still pretty covered up with work. and lose all day tomorrow, which is not good at all.
2. NOT A GOOD FOOTBALL DAY. so far. and it only looks to stay that way. 
3. i am sad that i am going to miss the rest of fall at home. going back to school tomorrow is not what i want to be doing. i wish i could stay at home and actually relax.

ahhh i'm so angry at my football teams right now. i can't even write a coherent thought. i just want to go to bed and sleep and forget about the embarrassment. but i have more work to do tonight and still have to shower. SO FRUSTRATING! this has not been a very relaxing fall break by any means. and just gearing up for a super stressful beginning of the week. and next weekend, too! ahhh, stress.

"friend me"

1. i'm really tired today/tonight for some reason. too much homework i guess. 
2. went to visit people, saw the social network, ate dinner with my parents. good day!
3. i am looking forward to all day homework tomorrow, paired with some football and some relaxation. 

the social network was crazy! it was really fast-paced and sometimes hard to follow but i like how they filmed the movie. i won't talk about it too much because i don't want to give it away. but the underhandedness to the whole scheme was somewhat shocking. i never knew facebook was born because of such dirty deeds! and the way he behaves with his friend is the most upsetting. but greed drives most every person on this planet, so i guess it was an inevitable process. it was a good movie and i definitely recommend it, especially for all rabid facebookers, but i also recommend reading up on the material and seeing how reality differs from hollywood.

where am i?

1. did homework most of the day, but i did take some time to procrastinate. i baked oatmeal cookies and took pictures outside and talked to people and watched grey's anatomy. good and relaxing day overall. 
2. found out that one of the books i thought i had to have read by tuesday is not really due until the following tuesday! whew, that's a nice lift off my shoulders. 
3. tomorrow should be a good day. not much time for homework but a break will be nice...and i get to see people and the social network! and eat a yummy italian dinner...

so i was looking today at these really cool pictures online from the nikon small world gallery. apparently, there is a whole field of photography that specializes in microscopic images that are then photographically altered. they were so beautiful and interesting and most were just random, everyday things. the one that struck me the most was the photo of the dividing cancer cells. it was freaky but it was a very pretty picture. it's strange how much of the world we can't see, or, how much of it we cannot see with the naked eye. perspective is so relative. i always wonder what insects or animals think when they look around--stuff must look HUGE. things that seem astronomical in size for us, like a redwood tree, think how that must feel for an ant. i guess it's different, though, because the frame of reference would be so skewed that the redwood tree would be all you see...it would be your home base. it's kind of like how humans feel about the ground i guess. well, now that is skewed since we can travel so easily, but it must have seemed that way in our history. i think it is ignorant and arrogant to assume that we are the only intelligent beings in existence. to think, historically humans must have thought that all there was to the world was the little plot of land that the eye could perceive. it progressed to thinking that the edge of the ocean was the end of the world, then that everything revolved around the earth. now we are shocked when we discover other things out in space--but why? we just tend to have a very self-centered view of our existence and i am eager for the day when people look back and say "they used to think that only their planet could support life!" and yes, it seems hard to imagine...but think about how our ancestors felt when contemplating that the world was round. it's all about perspective.

mountain mood

1. slept in later than normal today, finished up packing, got my italian midterm grade (94!), and drove home to fall in the mountains!
2. my shuffle on my ipod today was great! almost every single song was just what i wanted to hear. the music gods read my mind on a day when it definitely needed to be read.
3. family dinner and halloween episode of chopped! i need to get on deciding what my costume will be...tomorrow is a homework- and clothing-filled day. 

fall break is never really a break. there is always so much work to do! this week was actually set up to be a pretty easy week but i have to be a discussion leader for my three hour genocide class, so that requires a lot of prep, and i have to read two novels by next thursday (on top of the book i am presenting for monday). and i have an english midterm on tuesday! and i have a book report due on monday! yiiiikes. okay. i need to be very focused/structured on this fall break. and i essentially lose all day sunday since i have a lot going on that day with family/church/driving home. okay, i just got kind of overwhelmed. so i am going to get to bed early tonight in preparation for a long day of work tomorrow. interesting blog topic: semantics.

not in the mood

1. had classes today but got to watch a movie in one of them and talk about a movie in another, so it was overall not a very bad class day. 
2. got back from class and chilled out all afternoon. watched two online episodes and took a quick nap and packed/cleaned. 
3. ate german chocolate cake (made from scratch by my guy friends) and hung out for the night. saved up some of my day's calories just for the decadent dessert!

i keep procrastinating about blogging. part of me really just wants to take a break for awhile but i'm not going to do that. tomorrow i promise i'll have a better post. just not tonight. i'm definitely not in the blogging mood tonight. but i'm driving home tomorrow for fall break so it'll nice to be there for a few days and get to see my family!

crash into me

1. had italian today and found out that my class on wednesday is canceled! that means i can sleep in and leave whenever i want to for fall break--yippee!
2. rented crash from the library and watched it with my roommate. did the response and read the assigned article for it too...i love getting work done on time, haha. 
3. had my oral report in history today and contributed a lot to the discussion. also, i created an event online for spring break--can't wait!

crash is one of my favorite movies. of course the article i read had so many issues with the movie and raised so many problems, blah blah blah. not all movies are perfect commentaries on society! but the fact that the movie exposes so many hot-button issues for societal examination and conversation is important. the part of the movie that affects me the most is when the little girl jumps in her dad's arms and gets shot at with the blanks in the gun. i FREAKED OUT the first time i watched the movie. i was sobbing and unbelievably upset. i didn't know what blanks were, either, so i was even more upset! another powerful part is when the movie producer's wife is pulled from the burning car by the cop who molested her. the whole movie is not very hopeful and ends in the same way that it starts, reinforcing the message that there is not much hope for change. but maybe i am just looking at the movie with pessimistic glasses. let me know what y'all think!

B is for busy

1. had a lovely brunch with my family this morning and then got back on the road for school. i was stuck in traffic for a long time but still got back in time to get some homework done before crashing. 
2. i have a lot of work for tomorrow and i'm not sure when it's all going to get done! i think if i manage my time well and if i get a little bit lucky, it can all get done and i can still go to boxing club. 
3. 11 is a nice lucky number...maybe that is fortuitous! and 3 is also a good number and that's how many days until my fall break starts!!!

short post tonight because i don't have much to say because not much happened to me today! being stuck in traffic is DA WORST and it only makes me really angry and insane. and i am also getting stressed out thinking about all the packing i have to do for fall break and the cleaning, too! ahhh. okay, getting overwhelmed. checklists are good things and something i tend to use since i was raised in an organized family. i knew that october would be a busy month and that is turning out to be the truth! but november should be just as busy, and then december is busy for everyone because it's holiday season...my favorite. so fall break, halloween, NYC, sister visit, thanksgiving, exams, christmas, new years...2011. wowza.
bucket list item: find time for photography...and buy a new camera soon!

wedding bells.

1. woke up early this morning and drove home!!! the fall colors here are beautiful. 
2. hung out with family, got ready, went to the wedding!
3. it was so much fun. i had a great time and cried several times and it was just perfect. 

the wedding was beautiful. the ceremony was so sweet and very personal. i had a great time seeing a lot of people who i knew and enjoyed meeting new people as well. the reception was so well done. everything was very classy and in good taste, as i expected. i danced and lot with my family and it was so fun! i didn't miss college for a minute, except to wish that my friends could have been with me. but it's been a long day and i'm very tired and also think that i may be getting sick. for all of these reasons, i am now going to bed!

life planning.

1. had italian today. learned how to conjugate -ere and -ire verbs, and got an A- on the composition i got back! i was really tired, though, so i was glad class got out early. 
2. had an appointment with my academic adviser. we talked about classes for spring and graduation requirements and all that fun stuff. i have three semesters to complete 29 hours! and my history minor is finished. 
3. driving home tomorrow for a wedding, can't wait! had a fun night but i'm ready to go to sleep.

this wedding is about to be crazy. i am excited to blog about it tomorrow night. i have a long drive ahead of me, though, and need to get some sleep. 

fun fun fun. bed bed bed.

1. got my english midterm back today--A-...i'm happy with that!
2. got out early of classes today but then realized i'd left my keys at home this morning and was locked out : (
3. had a fun night with friends but now i'm really tired.

i just want to nap tomorrow. but i have to go to an advising appointment. and italian class! of course. oh well..i can just nap like i said.

awareness.

1. italian midterm today! i feel pretty good about it. i think i missed a few things but i'll find out for sure next week sometime. 
2. had a meeting with one of my lab mentors today. it was very helpful and helped me feel better about where i'm going...to an extent, anyway.
3. boxing club was so hard tonight. we had our fitness test--run two miles in 14 minutes (did not happen), do 60 situps in two minutes (did not happen--did 45), and do 30 regular pushups in two minutes (did not happen--did 25). SO, haha. the point is to assess where we are mid-semester and then reassess at the end of the semester. 

i've been reading my book, machete season, for my history book report on the rwandan genocide. it's very hard to read but also really captivating. it's essentially just interviews with perpetrators of the rwandan genocide. some of the most concentrated tutsi massacres were in the nyamta area and this is where the author pulled her sources from. they are all in prison at the time she writes the book, but she has nine or so killers she interviews about every stage of the genocide--before,during, and after. she also provides commentary along the way to help with the historical context and the facts from that time period. like i said, it's so hard to read and even harder to comprehend how it all happened, but the book makes some excellent points. i'm not finished with it yet, but should be pretty soon. also, she wrote a book before this one interviewing survivors of the genocide. i am not required to read that one but may read it just because sometime over a break. i am glad that i picked a book that is interesting and that is relatively short (only 251 pages). also, next week is fall break so i have some time to finish the actual book report during that break. the oral report is due monday, the actual report is due the 25th. but i'm also presenting for the readings for that week on the 25th so i need to be properly prepared for that. anyway, that's my blurb about the book! maybe this post will help me write my report for monday.

do un esame domani.

1. only had two classes today; one was canceled because of university day. i got to sleep in and take my time getting ready for my day. such a nice feeling. 
2. studied for my italian midterm tomorrow, took a short little nap, made some dinner, started a new book for my genocide class. 
3. had friends over for APPLE PIE that my roommate made. YUM. 

i want to just write things in italian for my blog post. sono C. sono di U.S.A. sono americana. sono bionda. this is how to conjugate -are verbs: -o, -i, -a, -iamo, -ate, -ano. irregular verbs: andare (to go): vado, vai, va, andiamo, andate, vanno. essere (to be (perm.)): sono, sei, e, siamo, siete, sono. avere (to have): ho, hai, ha, abbiamo, avete, hanno. singular-->plural (m and f): e-->i, a-->e. indefinite articles: un, uno, un', una, un' definite articles: il, lo, l', la, l'. i know a bunch of vocabulary words. i also learned several -are verbs. i learned questo and quello (this and that). that's pretty much all that's going to be on my test! i learned some basic things like greetings, numbers, the alphabet, etc. earlier in the semester, but those shouldn't be on my midterm. wish me luck!

tootsypoo.

1. italian class today! got out early, of course. spent the rest of the school day watching american gangster for a class and then going to my three hour class. 
2. came back, ate a small dinner, did some more reading. went to boxing club!
3. had a fun night after that eating a small dinner (part two) at qdoba with friends, hanging out at the apartment with other friends, and having a semi-sleepover with our third roommate!

i just looked at all these old pics of myself to show my roommate what i looked like when i was younger. they were so funny! i had such a cool haircut...not. haha. it was pretty entertaining to see all these old photos. my early class is canceled tomorrow due to university day! i'm excited that my classes don't start until two--yippee!

all about eve.

1. 12. that's a nice even number. but it's still a really high number, don't ya think?
2. been doing homework all day! well, not all day, but a lot of the day. did some cleaning and some lanudry too (yes, i washed my sheets). 
3. part of my homework was to watch guess who's coming to dinner. i really liked the movie. then i went on wikipedia and read all about spender tracy and katharine hepburn. such an...interesting pair. 

talked with my roommate after about the "golden age" in hollywood. tracy made 75 films. 75. that is so many. and hepburn won 4/12 best actress nominations. actors and actresses like that don't exist in this day and age. i think it's because anyone can go to hollywood and audition for a part. it's just seen as part of the american dream that you can go become famous. but it takes such talent and such passion and such direction to become the kind of actor or actress that was in hollywood during the golden age of hollywood. so much of it now is all trashy and gross. it's like the only time hollywood is classy is during the academy awards. but i'm sure much of my perception is skewed because i wasn't alive during that time and had no idea about what was actually happening and what was being reported. but sometimes i feel nostalgic...but for a time i never even was alive during! isn't that strange? america was so backwards in some respects (still is now, it's just transferred to different groups). but it also seemed really...romantic. but not romantic like "aww, that's so cute," romantic like how the golden age of a country can be romantic. i am having a hard time explaining myself now, probably because i'm tired of looking at a computer screen. so my bucket list item for tonight: watch all the classic old movies.

early bird special.

1. won our football game today!!! it was an exciting win at home. it was really hot for most of the game, but the shade felt wonderful when it finally fell. 
2. had a chill dinner at the apartment by myself. did some homework for monday (almost finished with the readings) and watched some tv. 
3. now getting ready to go out and hopefully have a fun night with friends! 

figured i would blog earlier in the night (for once). i'm excited for the saturday night festivities but sad that the weekends always seem to fly by! i got to skype with my boyfriend and one of my besties who are both in london right now and it was really funny! they seemed to be having a lot (ALOT) of fun. i know that they are both liking their respective countries and are having good semesters so far. it's hard, and an adjustment certainly, but i think it will all be worth it. people found out yesterday about study abroad for the spring--it's weird to think that i could have been one of them! i have a small twinge of regret, but i also keep thinking about all that i would have missed here and i am consoled. i know that next semester will be great and i know that my (hopeful) summer in florence will be a-ma-zing! i love italy and i can't wait to live there. i feel like italy is such a "C" country. for reasons that i am sure do not need explaining: food, fashion, culture, history, beauty, language. la vita bella!

flying time.

1. i don't feel like blogging much tonight. i had a pretty average day and a pretty boring night until i went and met up with friends. then my night got a lot better.
2. did a lot of my reading for monday today. i want to get a jump start on weekend homework so that i won't have a miserable sunday/monday.
3. i live for the weekends.

we have a home football game tomorrow afternoon and i'm excited! i love football and i love the weekends. i also get to watch some pretty good movies this weekend for my class on tuesday. italian midterm on wednesday and english paper due on thursday. then home for a wedding and then fall break week starts! i love october.

i'm full.

1. my last class of the day got canceled so i got to go home early! that was really nice. i also didn't have to sit through another boring class of british literature II. 
2. did some homework, took a short nap, went to the store.
3. spaghetti dinner!!! it was so much fun. 

i am really tired tonight and want to go to bed. boring post! but really, i know this usually happens on the weekends. so you should be used to it by now, right? we all figured out our costumes for halloween and also all talked about spring break! can't wait for 2011.

and the costume is...

1. italian class today but it didn't last for that long. midterm next wedesday so we are spending friday and monday reviewing.
2. didn't have participants to run today so i got out early and walked home in the beautiful weather! it was so nice outside and i got an early start on my homework. 
3. had a good night. boxing was even harder today because i was still sore from monday! and the cardio was outside and i fell during part of it (while trying to do step-ups on bleachers). yikes! but i know it's good for me.

okay. so. my costume for halloween is...barbie! i'm so excited! i am still figuring out what kind of barbie to be. malibu barbie is the obvious choice but it will also be...really cold. so i need to find a warmer outfit to wear but i also really want to make it obvious that i am barbie. me, my roommate, and my friend are all being different types of barbies. i think my roommate is being housewife barbie and my friend is being 80s barbie. it'll be a great night!!! i'll be coming back from NYC and ready to have a fun time. but i'll pick out an outfit soon and keep y'all updated. any suggestions?

noun

1. was entirely too domestic today, but it needed to get done. cleaned the apartment, made dinner, did laundry, mended a shirt, etc. it was almost like a stress reliever. 
2. had classes today but they were pretty interesting. my arms felt even more like lead/sore, though, so that made typing/writing all day interesting.
3. decided to be pro-active this week and start my hundreds of genocide reading earlier than saturday afternoon! we'll see if this actually happens since i also have a midterm thursday and a paper tuesday, but that is the hope!

so according to this guy in my english class, there is something wrong with me for liking the diary of a mad black woman. sorry i laugh at funny jokes and movies intended to be comedies? yeah, no. he's just an arrogant jerk who thinks he knows everything. but he didn't hurt my feelings or anything, just sparked a debate in the class. i think that's a step for me! usually i take everything so personally. but people were talking about how the movie was too dramatic to be a comedy, too much of a cliche, too much about tyler perry, too much this, too much that. all people did was complain. i tried to stick up for the movie as much as i could. i see some obvious problems with it, but there is no need to rake a movie like that through the coals. but it's bedtime for me. see how early i'm writing this blog?! something must be off-kilter in the world! but that is fine with me since it means more sleep.

pursuit of happines

1. i'm on the pursuit of happiness/ and i know that everything that shines ain't always gonna be gold/ i'll be fine once i get it/ i'll be good.
2. long day today. i think i might be getting sick so i need to start to getting to bed earlier! got a 100 on my oral interview in italian and had a pretty good day in history too. 
3. my night involved talking to my eurotrash boyfriend (just kidding!) and going to boxing club, then watching the diary of a mad black woman for my class tomorrow.

it was certainly an interesting movie. i had some issues with it for sure (it was too unrealistic and too happy of an ending, for example) but i think it was a well-made movie. definitely entertaining and thought-provoking. i'll be interested to say what people have to say about it in class tomorrow. but my arms are so weak and so heavy from boxing tonight. we did lots of actual boxing tonight, as well as lots of bear crawls and lots of pushups, as usual. but i will post more about this movie tomorrow night unless i come up with another topic. p.s. think about the zimbardo and milgram experiments as they relate to what you know about the holocaust's perpetrators, victims, and heroes.

history post

1. the days just keep on going. morning, night. giorno, sera. i wish they would fly by! or i wish that i could fly...one of the two.
2. had a long day of homework today and a long day of talking. 
3. i think 13 is a good place to start.

i just wish that someone had invented floo powder by now, geez. or a portkey. or even flying brooms! what are we muggles doing wrong?! oh well, c'est la vie outside of hogwarts. anyway, my exciting blog topic for the evening is...the holocaust! perhaps exciting is not the best word...but i've been reading about it all day and it always shocks me how the holocaust happened. i read a statistic today in my reading that hitler's "wars of aggression" cost 40-45 millions lives (including all the mass murdering). that is unbelievable to me. that's basically 1/6 americans (maybe closer to 1/7) just being wiped off the face of the earth (based on current population of america). some of the testimonials in my reading were so upsetting, especially the ones of survivors. what was almost more upsetting were the accounts of the absolute certainty and with which the higher-ups carried out the holocaust. there were no moral qualms, in fact great lengths were taken to prevent any questioning from citizens/troops/officials. it was so calculated, so vast, so evil. but another one of my readings claims that the holocaust is unique in several ways but one of the ways it is not unique is that it does not exist in a vacuum. essentially, he argues that the capabilities for such good and altruism could not exist in this world without the similar capabilities for evil and horror. i agree with the basic principle of this argument purely from my background as a psychology major. it seems like a yin-yang kind of theory...only with good can there be bad, and only with bad can there be good. it's like both have to exist in order for any sort of frame of reference for the other to be available. but that's just how i see it. there are plenty of people who disagree with me. for now, it's more holocaust reading, shower, then bed. let's hear a hoo-rah for the longest day of the week (monday)! not.

bucket list item: make good decisions. it's broad and it's intended to be slightly joking/funny, but it's also entirely true and an acceptable item, in my eyes, and that's all that matters!

being lame.

1. woke up before noon today and took a shower and got ready for the game! it was so much fun. we won and it felt so nice outside. 
2. went to dinner with a group of friends. yummy! then walked a lot and walked the dinner off, haha.
3. had a really fun night with friends chilling at a house.

don't have a blog topic for tonight. but i'll write a better one tomorrow.

wow.

1. italian class today; got my assignment for our first oral exam! mine is on wednesday but it shouldn't be too bad. 
2. had a nice lunch with a friend today; it was great to catch up with her.
3. craaaazy night.

insanity. madness. holy moly. i'm going to bed.

yum yum yum

1. long day of classes today. as per usual. but at least it stopped raining! 
2. out to the university down the road to hang out with high school friends. it's just what i need. 
3. i miss these friends a lot of the time. but i also love my friends from school!

short blog post tonight because i am with all my friends and i don't want to be antisocial for too long. but i am at least blogging and i will have more time tomorrow to blog about a more interesting topic. 

rain, rain, go away! come back on sunday.

1. busy day today! but wednesday is over; i'm over the hump and ready for the weekend. of course, i still have three classes tomorrow but they shouldn't be too bad. homework for them is almost finished. 
2. boxing tonight was hard! but we got our wrist wraps in and learned how to wrap our hands. then we got to put on gloves and hit these mitt things that our partners had on. after 30 minutes each of cardio and strength workouts...
3. ate breakfast for dinner! yummy. full of protein and carbs to replenish my depleted body after the two hour workout. oh, p.s. i got a 97 on my italian quiz!

i am going to bed! it rained all day and it put me in a bad mood. i'm sick of wearing rain boots! and my calves are big so my rain boots always rip on the back seam. hmph. so i'm totally over the rain, although we need it a lot. so that is why i'm not blogging! blame the weather gods! but it's supposed to stop by 10 am tomorrow so maybe tomorrow night will be better!

tired body

1. long day of classes and homework today...but i'm almost over the mid-week hump! usually from wednesday on i have a pretty low-key week. 
2. started the spring break 2011 powerpoint presentation! also contacted all the owners to ask about renting to a group of college students...we'll see how that turns out. also used another website and found a bunch more houses to sort through!
3. led my own workout session tonight before chopped champions finale!!! it was so good. i won't ruin anything for the viewers who have not yet seen it.

tonight is another short post because i almost forgot about it and don't have to time to do a good post before bed! but as a side note, all comments are appreciated, even if they are cynical. and a comment on yesterday's post raised a good point about the movie that i will address thursday when i have seen the entire movie and finished up discussion with the class. oh, i also got a ticket for the football game this weekend...couldn't remember if i mentioned that already. i'm excited!!! it's an afternoon game too, so that is very nice. but tata for now...ciao!

p.s. i love this picture.

a requiem

1. longest. day. ever. learned how to conjugate verbs ending in -are in italian today, watched parts one and two of when the levees broke, had a surprisingly interesting and heated discussion in history, meeting, boxing, (almost) bedtime. 
2. GOT A POSTCARD FROM SPAIN TODAY!!! it was so exciting, obviously. 
3. can't wait for it to be october 1st and can't wait for the wedding weekend! being at home during the fall will be amazing. 

okay, so as promised: an explanation. i would choose to vote republican over not voting at all because i know that my one vote switching from democrat to republican would not have an effect. on the same note, however, why just not vote at all then? something about not voting gives me the heebeejeebees. i don't know if i could not vote...that goes against all that i stand for. then again, voting republican does also. but i stand by my claim (obviously, because i'm stubborn).
truly am very exhausted so this will be semi-short. but it goes along with the tidbit i just posted above and relates to my watching of when the levees broke. OMG, WTF?!?! that movie is crazy so far. i was mid-teens when it happened and well aware of the situation but it blows my mind to watch it all again, five years later. clearly, the movie had political and social biases and implications, but even those aside, just the basic facts about the katrina disaster bloooow my mind. it's unreal to me. the sheer idiocy of george bush, michael browning, michael chernoff, everyone at the federal level is appalling. I HATE GEORGE BUSH. his smirk is possibly the most insulting facial expression i have ever seen. that's all that the federal government did to victims of katrina--add insult to injury. and yes, i will have the people who disagree with me, but i couldn't care less. oh, so we were in a war on terror and we couldn't deal with the horrifying terror that was thrown in our face in our own country?! real cool, america. and yes there were admirable and important and miraculous efforts from thousands of people in this country and abroad...but what about the millions of people who did nothing? to quote the lady in the movie, "i hope they can sleep at night."

tough choices...

1. long day of homework! i literally did homework for about 10 hours today. and all for one class! whoo hoooo. classes tomorrow, homework tomorrow, meeting tomorrow, boxing tomorrow. the beginnings of my weeks are always jam-packed. 
2. my friend discovered this amazing website that i am now addicted to... http://www.outdoor-photos.com/
3. today was a tough day. but at least i have a blog topic...

there is this game, it's called would you rather. so i've decided to play it on my blog and answer some "would you rather..." questions. if you have any that you are interested in knowing the answer to, just post them in the comments section and i'll answer the next day! also, if you want explanation for any of these, just comment and ask about whichever one.
would you rather...
be blind or be deaf?     deaf.
go to italy or go to hawaii?     hawaii.
watch basketball or watch football?     football.
have an australian or have a french accent?     french.
be a model or be an actress?     actress.
lose taste or lose smell?     smell.
be invisible or be able to fly?     be able to fly.
have bad teeth or bad hair?     bad hair.
live at the beach or live in the city?     live in the city.
have a mental illness or a chronic physical illness?     mental illness.
vote republican or not vote at all?     vote republican. 
be from the north or be from the midwest? death by samurai sword!

bucket list item: stay at an open air hotel under the stars.

the best joke ever.

1. slept pretty late today...but still did some homework. so i had a semi-productive day. but i still have some homework to do tomorrow. a lot of homework to do tomorrow. 
2. we decided on halloween costumes! can't waittttt. i'll reveal the final decision later. 
3. had a fun night with friends. it was pretty chill, so that was nice. watched some hilarious videos from last night. good. times. 

i am taking a reader's advice starting tomorrow. but not for tonight. tonight, i am guilt-free going to sleep.

i want some pie.

1. yes, roommate, I AM TIRED. there, i said it. so surprising. NOT.
2. i think i did well on my italian quiz today but i probably won't find out until next wednesday. 
3. one week from today is the first of october. i could not be happier!

stop reading this blog, i feel bad already. because i said i would blog about something interesting, but here i am blogging the same thing i always say.

my room!

1. not-as-long-as-usual day of classes today. i love having my last class canceled. 
2. had a friend over, relaxed some, went to the grocery, and studied. 
3. watched the season premiere of grey's anatomy!!!

just another thursday night! i have a better post for tomorrow night, i promise. i'm just watching a tv show right now and i'm going to go out soon so i need to get ready. but tomorrow will be better. promise!

vivaldi

1. italian class today. it was good, we got out early, of course. quiz on friday and i want to do really well! i'm in a competition with my friend to see who does the best on italian quizzes. 
2. spent the rest of the day in my two psych labs doing lab-related work. then came home and took a breather before boxing club! 
3. english class is canceled for tomorrow! whoo hoo, that means i get out at 3:15. 

i am all booked up for my nyc trip on halloween weekend! i am very excited. i am ready for the weekend but very nervous about how it's all going to happen. i know that i can do well but it's all about my mindset. i will (hopefully) be meeting some pretty famous researchers and i want to make an impression. i am also gearing up for a hopeful poster for another conference next fall. got to get all that written up and submitted by the first-ish of february. on a side note, today was the autumnal equinox and that means...FALL!!! too bad it's still about 90 degrees here every day. i always try to rank the seasons in my mind but i never can. i think spring in full swing might be my favorite, but i also really love fall. a chill but sunny fall day is one of the best there can be for me. however, summer is always a classic choice because of the break in school, the opportunities for vacations, my birthday, the hot weather, sundresses, etc. but...i also really like winter! i love snow and cold weather and getting all bundled up. okay, so i'm partially really excited for fall in NYC because of all the fashion-y and chilly clothes i get to wear. yes, i can be that shallow. i love the seasons and i want to live in a place that has seasons, real seasons. where i am now there are seasons...kind of. where i grew up, now those are real seasons. but we'll see where the wind takes me. for now, i better go find another summer outfit for school tomorrow...so frustrating. it's time for jeans and sweaters and scarves and jackets and boots!
the seasons by james thomson.

now, stop! it's mantra time.

1. watching chopped champions! this is the last round before the ultimate showdown. i love this show; i  never get tired of it. 
2. had a so-so day today. i woke up and was just exhausted. but i'm over the mid-week hump and wednesdays are usually better for me. i just have to pace myself homework wise and i should be okay. 
3. i was draining my chocolate pudding cup of the film of liquid that sits on top and it fell into the trashcan! i was so upset. not a good ending to my day!

had a blah day today but while i was working out towards the end of the night, after i most likely re-injured my quad muscle (we'll see how it is in the morning), i realized that i need to have some mantras that i repeat to myself daily. so i have written them down elsewhere since mantras can be somewhat personal. but whenever i notice myself thinking in a particular way, i will say my mantra until i am thinking on track again. the power of positive thinking! i need to stop writing so much about myself, though. even though this is my blog...tomorrow i will have a topic that is more compelling and more applicable. can't wait?!

ouchie.

1. boxing club is so fun. i like it a lot now. and my two friends and i volunteered to be social committee chair members. we get to plan fun social events! whoo hoo!
2. long three hour class today after italian class. and i also watched two long movies but they were both pretty good--inside man and jackie brown.
3. still some homework to do. ugh. and the roach count for the day is two: one dead, one alive. now dead. 

have a migraine. strained my quads at boxing. tired and want to go to bed but can't. need to shower still. long day of classes tomorrow. miss my family/home friends/boyfriend/home/kitty. these are all the reasons i am not writing a long blog post! sorry...goodnight. talk tomorrow? YES!

no longer a teenage dream

1. talked with my boyfriend for part of the day. it was good to catch up and talk. i miss talking with him face-to-face, so computer talking will have to suffice for now. 
2. make pancakes for breakfast (!), cleaned the apartment living room/kitchen, did laundry, organized my room, did homework, made a red and green bell pepper and provolone quiche for dinner. um, can you say domestic?! 
3. read about premodern and early genocide allllll day. such a depressing topic! and not really helpful in my quest to remain upbeat and cheerful. but, i finally finished the 205 pages of reading and am getting to bed relatively early in prep for classes/homework/boxing club tomorrow. 

it*s a beautiful day. today has been a better day. an even better day will come in 104 day! that's not so long...right? i'm taking all of this a day at a time. just...life in general. my eyes are currently having trouble focusing since essentially i've looked in the same place all day today (two feet in front of me). but i am optimistic again and excited for the winding down of september and the starting up of october. i just had a thought that it will be very interesting for me to read through all these posts once the year is over. i've done it before, in may or somwhere in there, but reading the entire year from start to finish will be so gratifying. i'm glad that i kept note of three things from each day simply so i can be reminded of how things went on a daily basis. i want this year to finish out quickly, but that also means that another year is gone! 2010 has been so good to me so far, quite a bit better than 2009, that i'm nervous for it to end. 2011 will be a stressful year! okay, okay i've got to stop looking so far into the future! i think reading all this history is what makes me think long term (like two years is long term). my plan for the next time i have some downtime is to go back through and read the hunger games series. can't wait for that downtime to roll around! my bucket list item for tonight is rather mundane, but important to me and it needs to be set in stone: pick classes for the remaining three semesters that really are interesting to me and fit into a schedule that i am totally happy with. 

 

trying

1. had a long, hot afternoon sitting in the boiling sun for a football game that we didn't even win! the atmosphere was...fun for the most part. 
2. went to never ending pasta bowl night at olive garden with friends. it was so much food! but i didn't eat much during the day, so it wasn't as bad. i got three bowls and had leftovers from the last one. yummy carbs!
3. had a pretty boring night. we were all carb drunk and not into moving around much. then again, other people had fun but i just kind of sat there.

i'm trying to stay positive and trying to stay upbeat. i'll let you know how this goes...hope all is well for everyone reading this post. and this blog. thank you all for reading. i'll post better tomorrow when i'm feeling a little better.

lateness

1. so freakin' tired, this is unbelievable. have to wake up pretty early for the football game tomorrow too. but i'm excited!
2. having people over tonight for seven layer dip and cookies--let rock bottom friday begin! 
3. good day of classes; got out of italian early...again! and had a few participants to run before going back to the apartment to relax.

have to book my trip for the conference soon. i'm excited that october will be a busy month. staying busy is a good thing for me! i was kind of irritated tonight for a few hours but pretty much got over that when my friends came over. and i got to see friends from high school! that was fun. anyway, i've got to get some sleep before the football game and whatever antics are happening on saturday night. happy friday!

sono bionda!

1. long day of classes today, but my last class let out about 15 minutes early, so that was nice! and i didn't have much homework for friday so i got that knocked out quickly. 
2. finished mockingjay today! it was so so so good. and heartwrenching. but i won't spoil it any more! i want to go back and read them all very soon, probably over christmas break.
3. out to eat with my friends tonight; ladies' night is starting soon so i'm excited for that. i need some fun in my life right now. 

i've been the lamest blogger ever lately! someone asked me earlier why i had a blog and i explained the new year's resolution and how i wanted to make one that i actually stuck to this time around and he accepted it as an answer and gave the typical response of "oh, that's cool." but then i started to wonder why i really am doing this blog. it's been such a long time since i started this blog, or so it seems. i have to reacquaint myself with my reasoning. because sometimes it really is a pain in the ass to blog (as you can tell from my apologetic, short, lame blog posts). sometimes it just feels like a routine that i have to go through and a way to prove to myself that i can stick to a resolution. but then doesn't it seem a tad disingenuous to continue if my heart isn't in it? perhaps, but that's how spiteful i am. and stubborn. and determined. this is kind of like the italian homework i had tonight: describe yourself using adjectives you have learned so far. the ones i just used weren't on the list, unfortunately. anyway, i'm trying to be better about blogging. tonight was a semi-long post! i need to have more funny ones. maybe when i'm in a funnier mood. hopefully that will come soon!

let's fly away...

1. italian class today, a break during which i ate lunch and read for class/pleasure. then had lab time for two hours! boxing club tonight; it was hard, as always.
2. got stuff all worked out for my travel scholarship, i think. also got an email today about how i can apply for a travel scholarship for italy in the summer. that'd be nice!
3. you know i'm thinking you and your family...

don't feel much like talking tonight. i'm really tired and it's been a long day. lots of things are on my mind and most of them are stressful. i wish it were the weekend so i could just relax some and de-stress. but i'll keep on plugging and get through. i feel like i've been emotionally and mentally and spiritually boxed as well as physically.

destiny's child?

1. long day. lots of homework, three classes, some interpersonal stress to boot. i really enjoy all my classes though, so that is a definite plus. the one i was most excited about in the beginning of the year (history of genocide and the holocaust) will probably end up being one of my lesser favorites simply because of the time frame. but i like my southern lit class and my film and culture classes a lot. and italian, obviously.
2. saw some friends today i don't usually see. talked with my mom and sister and boyfriend. got ready for school tomorrow. skipped crossfit because it was supposed to be hella hard (like, squatting with people thrown over your back like a sack of potatoes and bench pressing people. that kind of hella hard). and i walked a fair amount today and was also still a little sore from boxing. i need to catch up on sleep, too.
3. buuuut what might prevent that sleep catch-up is the new book i started, mockingjay. i won't say anything in case people want to read it, but it's great so far! it's so easy for me to devour novels...why is it not that easy to read academic material?

being independent is important to me. it always has been and it always will be. i like to be strong, stubborn, and my own person. college has really helped me embrace that part of myself and to move away from the high school-y clique-ish mentality that so pervades life as a female. i care less now about trying to please everyone, especially if it means being fake, and just living my life to make myself and those i care most about happy. obviously i'm not turning into some sort of monster or anything, i just don't care as much about stupid drama anymore. reason number high-on-the-list i am not involved with greek life. i have really come into a state of happiness in these past several months and i'm overjoyed that college is suddenly turning into the time in my life when i figure out who i am like everyone told me. it just feels right and it feels good (although one part of my life is currently residing elsewhere). so these are good feelings and i get good vibes about this year. we'll see how it goes! so far i was right about 2010 being a great year, but there is still time for the universe to throw that in my face (ever superstitious!).

let's be real.

1. such a long day today, it was ridiculous. only had two classes but i had a quiz in one and the other one is a three hour class that meets once a week. and in between classes i had to watch two movies and read a lot and write a response. it's been crazy.
2. took a fifteen minute nap before boxing club. it was so hard, of course! but i think it'll be worth it for sure. going with friends makes it a lot better. 
3. have been working ever since i got back from boxing. still have to find time to take a shower and then finally get some sleep. ahhhh please let it be the middle of the week already. or better yet, the weekend!

i hate enablers. i was watching this show on drug addicts and got so angry about the families. they just excuse the addiction and make it seem not as bad as it is and continue the cycle of addiction. an addiction is inexcusable and totally beatable. it takes unbelievable will/determination/support. but families cannot be a copout for addicts. they cannot feel this sense of responsibility and loyalty when it is destroying the addict. that is unfair and horrible and will slowly ruin the addict's life. i know that i've never had to deal with an addict but it's just not fair how families perpetuate addiction because they don't want to be forceful or mean or harsh. but sometimes tough love is the best way to show how much you really do love someone.

laughing makes for flat abs

1. had the most amazing weekend ever. it was pure fun. 
2. left the beach today and came back to lots of homework and even more hilarious pictures. SUCH fun times; i love weekends; i love college; i love my life. 
3. have some homework to catch up on, but that is totally fine with me. i'm almost caught up, but will probably have to skip boxing club tomorrow night to get truly caught up.

my friends are so important to me. i spend so much time laughing and having a great time. there are definitely "circle of trust" moments as well. i am just in a great mood and had a great weekend. it's times like these that keep me upbeat and happy and not ruminating, although it is always on my mind. now it's time to buckle down for a new week! bucket list item: make presents for my friends.

DAAAA beach

1. woke up this morning and cleaned the apartment before leaving for the beach. 
2. the beach has been so much fun so far! we were in the water for a long time today, then took naps on the beach, hot tub, dinner, catch phrase (!), more hanging out on the beach and in the hot tub. 
3. going home early tomorrow so that i can do mad work. and hopefully eat pasta at olive garden's never ending pasta bowl promotion.

i don't feel like blogging tonight. i'm so tired from last night and the beach today and these past few days in general.

winning london!

1. early blog post tonight...maybe i'm learning! at the almost end of this blog, haha. 
2. my italian class let out early again and then i went to a luminary lighting for the culmination of suicide prevention week. up next was a meeting for a psych lab and then chill out time. 
3. went to noodles (yum) and then started prep for the people coming over tonight! goodbye, dear suitie! you will be missed...but you'll have an awesome time! 

can't wait, can't wait, can't wait for this weekend!!! we're having people over tonight to celebrate, then going to the beach tomorrow for the night with our friends in a house that sleeps 30 people! that's such a huge house, and we're going for free, save gas money. BALLER. but really, so cool. and i have a lot of work this weekend but i know that i can get it all done. this is what being a junior is all about, i guess. balancing work and fun. that's weird--i'm a junior. okay, no time for a temporary freak out session. time to have fun! and be save, obviously.

planning a trip!

1. long day of classes today, broken up by...reading for classes! but the weekend is fast approaching. 
2. had all the guys over tonight and made brownies and had good talks! circle of trust=good. roaches=bad. 
3. time to sleeeep and get ready for class tomorrow and then the closing of national suicide prevention week.

i am pretty sure the people in my film and culture class hate me. i always try to present the views of the place where i grew up and to try and bring some perspective to the class. but i think i just make enemies. we talked about american history x this week and everyone was just saying the same stuff over and over so i tried to just bring in a new viewpoint. obviously i'm not a skinhead, people. i just don't like when discussions are one-sided and boring and too liberal/unrealistic. so now i pissed those people off (but made excellent points, might i add). then today, i brought up the feminine role in the film and made the feminists of the class angry. but people were just saying stupid stuff about how the sister and mom were strong female figures and i totally disagreed! they never stood up to derek for more than a few minutes (before backing down), they totally ignored all his skinhead and racist ideology and practices, and after prison they took him back into their lives like nothing ever happened. and they tolerated the same bullshit from danny. i'm sorry, but i do not respect that, or see those women in a positive/strong feminine light. so now the feminists are angry at me. oh freakin' well. i feel that i made intelligent, thoughtful remarks and the teacher seemed to agree with/think about my points. and she is the one who ultimately assigns the grade.

stick and jab!

1. had a long, busy day today. class at ten, then meetings and commitments from then on out until around four. at least i was productive.
2. went to boxing club for the first meeting and it was an intense workout! but i'm joining with two other friends of mine and hopefully it will whip us into shape. 
3. this week is national suicide prevention week. comment if you want information about how you can get information about ways you can help (including funding my out of the darkness walk hosted by the AFSP).

the plan for boxing club and crossfit? to get in shape. i used to be in really great shape when i played soccer. i went to the gym 4-5 days a week in high school after i quit soccer, but never really kept up a strict regimen in college. i gained a few pounds and you can't even really tell, but i just want to feel and look how i used to. so my goal is so get in great cardiovascular shape and get as toned as a girl with a body type me can. i just feel really motivated and really ready to look how i used to and feel how i used to. not that i look or feel bad now by any means...i just want to get back to my status quo. but i also don't want to become consumed with calorie counting or anything like that. as long as i look and feel great and am happy and eating well, that's what counts for me. whoo hoo for enthusiasm!

meh.

1. had two classes today instead of three--that was a bright spot!
2. got to talk to my parents and my boyfriend. did some homework and hung out before...
3. crossfit! it was really hard. but i'm glad i did it. i plan on going on thursday too. 

not really in the mood to blog tonight (shocker). but i will post about america and our society and the movie and the class i had today. i promise! maybe on thursday since that's when i have my next class. it'll be a good, long post--i promise! now it's bed time.

Xcuses

1. had a lazy day. chatted with my boyfriend, did some homework, cleaned/finally bought kitchen stuff. 
2. watched american history x and cried. one of the most powerful movies i have ever seen.
3. then, saw this article. why is life so painfully ironic sometimes? http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100907/ap_on_re_as/as_afghanistan

i am just in shock about the state of our society. but i'd rather not go into a societal rant this late at night/early in the morning. i'll save that for tomorrow. trust me, i won't forget about the thoughts going on in my head now...utter disbelief.

finally a good bucket.

1. woke up kinda late (before noon, but still). cleaned the apartment, read some poetry homework, painted my toenails, took a shower. 
2. ate a delicious salad for dinner. got to talk to my boyfriend today! and just hung out all day. it was so nice. i love sundays. 
3. got to look at pictures from sevilla! it seems like a gorgeous and funky city. hopefully a fun night is ahead of me (yes, i am blogging before i get too tired). 

bucket list item: keep a travel blog but also a travel journal from now forward for extended trips.