trying

1. had a long, hot afternoon sitting in the boiling sun for a football game that we didn't even win! the atmosphere was...fun for the most part. 
2. went to never ending pasta bowl night at olive garden with friends. it was so much food! but i didn't eat much during the day, so it wasn't as bad. i got three bowls and had leftovers from the last one. yummy carbs!
3. had a pretty boring night. we were all carb drunk and not into moving around much. then again, other people had fun but i just kind of sat there.

i'm trying to stay positive and trying to stay upbeat. i'll let you know how this goes...hope all is well for everyone reading this post. and this blog. thank you all for reading. i'll post better tomorrow when i'm feeling a little better.

lateness

1. so freakin' tired, this is unbelievable. have to wake up pretty early for the football game tomorrow too. but i'm excited!
2. having people over tonight for seven layer dip and cookies--let rock bottom friday begin! 
3. good day of classes; got out of italian early...again! and had a few participants to run before going back to the apartment to relax.

have to book my trip for the conference soon. i'm excited that october will be a busy month. staying busy is a good thing for me! i was kind of irritated tonight for a few hours but pretty much got over that when my friends came over. and i got to see friends from high school! that was fun. anyway, i've got to get some sleep before the football game and whatever antics are happening on saturday night. happy friday!

sono bionda!

1. long day of classes today, but my last class let out about 15 minutes early, so that was nice! and i didn't have much homework for friday so i got that knocked out quickly. 
2. finished mockingjay today! it was so so so good. and heartwrenching. but i won't spoil it any more! i want to go back and read them all very soon, probably over christmas break.
3. out to eat with my friends tonight; ladies' night is starting soon so i'm excited for that. i need some fun in my life right now. 

i've been the lamest blogger ever lately! someone asked me earlier why i had a blog and i explained the new year's resolution and how i wanted to make one that i actually stuck to this time around and he accepted it as an answer and gave the typical response of "oh, that's cool." but then i started to wonder why i really am doing this blog. it's been such a long time since i started this blog, or so it seems. i have to reacquaint myself with my reasoning. because sometimes it really is a pain in the ass to blog (as you can tell from my apologetic, short, lame blog posts). sometimes it just feels like a routine that i have to go through and a way to prove to myself that i can stick to a resolution. but then doesn't it seem a tad disingenuous to continue if my heart isn't in it? perhaps, but that's how spiteful i am. and stubborn. and determined. this is kind of like the italian homework i had tonight: describe yourself using adjectives you have learned so far. the ones i just used weren't on the list, unfortunately. anyway, i'm trying to be better about blogging. tonight was a semi-long post! i need to have more funny ones. maybe when i'm in a funnier mood. hopefully that will come soon!

let's fly away...

1. italian class today, a break during which i ate lunch and read for class/pleasure. then had lab time for two hours! boxing club tonight; it was hard, as always.
2. got stuff all worked out for my travel scholarship, i think. also got an email today about how i can apply for a travel scholarship for italy in the summer. that'd be nice!
3. you know i'm thinking you and your family...

don't feel much like talking tonight. i'm really tired and it's been a long day. lots of things are on my mind and most of them are stressful. i wish it were the weekend so i could just relax some and de-stress. but i'll keep on plugging and get through. i feel like i've been emotionally and mentally and spiritually boxed as well as physically.

destiny's child?

1. long day. lots of homework, three classes, some interpersonal stress to boot. i really enjoy all my classes though, so that is a definite plus. the one i was most excited about in the beginning of the year (history of genocide and the holocaust) will probably end up being one of my lesser favorites simply because of the time frame. but i like my southern lit class and my film and culture classes a lot. and italian, obviously.
2. saw some friends today i don't usually see. talked with my mom and sister and boyfriend. got ready for school tomorrow. skipped crossfit because it was supposed to be hella hard (like, squatting with people thrown over your back like a sack of potatoes and bench pressing people. that kind of hella hard). and i walked a fair amount today and was also still a little sore from boxing. i need to catch up on sleep, too.
3. buuuut what might prevent that sleep catch-up is the new book i started, mockingjay. i won't say anything in case people want to read it, but it's great so far! it's so easy for me to devour novels...why is it not that easy to read academic material?

being independent is important to me. it always has been and it always will be. i like to be strong, stubborn, and my own person. college has really helped me embrace that part of myself and to move away from the high school-y clique-ish mentality that so pervades life as a female. i care less now about trying to please everyone, especially if it means being fake, and just living my life to make myself and those i care most about happy. obviously i'm not turning into some sort of monster or anything, i just don't care as much about stupid drama anymore. reason number high-on-the-list i am not involved with greek life. i have really come into a state of happiness in these past several months and i'm overjoyed that college is suddenly turning into the time in my life when i figure out who i am like everyone told me. it just feels right and it feels good (although one part of my life is currently residing elsewhere). so these are good feelings and i get good vibes about this year. we'll see how it goes! so far i was right about 2010 being a great year, but there is still time for the universe to throw that in my face (ever superstitious!).

let's be real.

1. such a long day today, it was ridiculous. only had two classes but i had a quiz in one and the other one is a three hour class that meets once a week. and in between classes i had to watch two movies and read a lot and write a response. it's been crazy.
2. took a fifteen minute nap before boxing club. it was so hard, of course! but i think it'll be worth it for sure. going with friends makes it a lot better. 
3. have been working ever since i got back from boxing. still have to find time to take a shower and then finally get some sleep. ahhhh please let it be the middle of the week already. or better yet, the weekend!

i hate enablers. i was watching this show on drug addicts and got so angry about the families. they just excuse the addiction and make it seem not as bad as it is and continue the cycle of addiction. an addiction is inexcusable and totally beatable. it takes unbelievable will/determination/support. but families cannot be a copout for addicts. they cannot feel this sense of responsibility and loyalty when it is destroying the addict. that is unfair and horrible and will slowly ruin the addict's life. i know that i've never had to deal with an addict but it's just not fair how families perpetuate addiction because they don't want to be forceful or mean or harsh. but sometimes tough love is the best way to show how much you really do love someone.

laughing makes for flat abs

1. had the most amazing weekend ever. it was pure fun. 
2. left the beach today and came back to lots of homework and even more hilarious pictures. SUCH fun times; i love weekends; i love college; i love my life. 
3. have some homework to catch up on, but that is totally fine with me. i'm almost caught up, but will probably have to skip boxing club tomorrow night to get truly caught up.

my friends are so important to me. i spend so much time laughing and having a great time. there are definitely "circle of trust" moments as well. i am just in a great mood and had a great weekend. it's times like these that keep me upbeat and happy and not ruminating, although it is always on my mind. now it's time to buckle down for a new week! bucket list item: make presents for my friends.

DAAAA beach

1. woke up this morning and cleaned the apartment before leaving for the beach. 
2. the beach has been so much fun so far! we were in the water for a long time today, then took naps on the beach, hot tub, dinner, catch phrase (!), more hanging out on the beach and in the hot tub. 
3. going home early tomorrow so that i can do mad work. and hopefully eat pasta at olive garden's never ending pasta bowl promotion.

i don't feel like blogging tonight. i'm so tired from last night and the beach today and these past few days in general.

winning london!

1. early blog post tonight...maybe i'm learning! at the almost end of this blog, haha. 
2. my italian class let out early again and then i went to a luminary lighting for the culmination of suicide prevention week. up next was a meeting for a psych lab and then chill out time. 
3. went to noodles (yum) and then started prep for the people coming over tonight! goodbye, dear suitie! you will be missed...but you'll have an awesome time! 

can't wait, can't wait, can't wait for this weekend!!! we're having people over tonight to celebrate, then going to the beach tomorrow for the night with our friends in a house that sleeps 30 people! that's such a huge house, and we're going for free, save gas money. BALLER. but really, so cool. and i have a lot of work this weekend but i know that i can get it all done. this is what being a junior is all about, i guess. balancing work and fun. that's weird--i'm a junior. okay, no time for a temporary freak out session. time to have fun! and be save, obviously.

planning a trip!

1. long day of classes today, broken up by...reading for classes! but the weekend is fast approaching. 
2. had all the guys over tonight and made brownies and had good talks! circle of trust=good. roaches=bad. 
3. time to sleeeep and get ready for class tomorrow and then the closing of national suicide prevention week.

i am pretty sure the people in my film and culture class hate me. i always try to present the views of the place where i grew up and to try and bring some perspective to the class. but i think i just make enemies. we talked about american history x this week and everyone was just saying the same stuff over and over so i tried to just bring in a new viewpoint. obviously i'm not a skinhead, people. i just don't like when discussions are one-sided and boring and too liberal/unrealistic. so now i pissed those people off (but made excellent points, might i add). then today, i brought up the feminine role in the film and made the feminists of the class angry. but people were just saying stupid stuff about how the sister and mom were strong female figures and i totally disagreed! they never stood up to derek for more than a few minutes (before backing down), they totally ignored all his skinhead and racist ideology and practices, and after prison they took him back into their lives like nothing ever happened. and they tolerated the same bullshit from danny. i'm sorry, but i do not respect that, or see those women in a positive/strong feminine light. so now the feminists are angry at me. oh freakin' well. i feel that i made intelligent, thoughtful remarks and the teacher seemed to agree with/think about my points. and she is the one who ultimately assigns the grade.

stick and jab!

1. had a long, busy day today. class at ten, then meetings and commitments from then on out until around four. at least i was productive.
2. went to boxing club for the first meeting and it was an intense workout! but i'm joining with two other friends of mine and hopefully it will whip us into shape. 
3. this week is national suicide prevention week. comment if you want information about how you can get information about ways you can help (including funding my out of the darkness walk hosted by the AFSP).

the plan for boxing club and crossfit? to get in shape. i used to be in really great shape when i played soccer. i went to the gym 4-5 days a week in high school after i quit soccer, but never really kept up a strict regimen in college. i gained a few pounds and you can't even really tell, but i just want to feel and look how i used to. so my goal is so get in great cardiovascular shape and get as toned as a girl with a body type me can. i just feel really motivated and really ready to look how i used to and feel how i used to. not that i look or feel bad now by any means...i just want to get back to my status quo. but i also don't want to become consumed with calorie counting or anything like that. as long as i look and feel great and am happy and eating well, that's what counts for me. whoo hoo for enthusiasm!

meh.

1. had two classes today instead of three--that was a bright spot!
2. got to talk to my parents and my boyfriend. did some homework and hung out before...
3. crossfit! it was really hard. but i'm glad i did it. i plan on going on thursday too. 

not really in the mood to blog tonight (shocker). but i will post about america and our society and the movie and the class i had today. i promise! maybe on thursday since that's when i have my next class. it'll be a good, long post--i promise! now it's bed time.

Xcuses

1. had a lazy day. chatted with my boyfriend, did some homework, cleaned/finally bought kitchen stuff. 
2. watched american history x and cried. one of the most powerful movies i have ever seen.
3. then, saw this article. why is life so painfully ironic sometimes? http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100907/ap_on_re_as/as_afghanistan

i am just in shock about the state of our society. but i'd rather not go into a societal rant this late at night/early in the morning. i'll save that for tomorrow. trust me, i won't forget about the thoughts going on in my head now...utter disbelief.

finally a good bucket.

1. woke up kinda late (before noon, but still). cleaned the apartment, read some poetry homework, painted my toenails, took a shower. 
2. ate a delicious salad for dinner. got to talk to my boyfriend today! and just hung out all day. it was so nice. i love sundays. 
3. got to look at pictures from sevilla! it seems like a gorgeous and funky city. hopefully a fun night is ahead of me (yes, i am blogging before i get too tired). 

bucket list item: keep a travel blog but also a travel journal from now forward for extended trips. 

firenze?

1. did absolutely nothing today, haha. woke up, skyped with my boyfriend, and hung around the apartment. 
2. went to the mall with my roommate, ate at CPK (!), and came back to watch the first football game of the season!
3. i love three day weekends. they're so much fun! 

i'm such a procrastinator. i need to get better at blogging. the problem is that i wait until it's late at night and then i am just so tired that i want to get it over with. but maybe i'll start blogging better soon. don't give up hope on me! i know that i am also going to do a travel blog while i am abroad in italy next summer. if i get to go! i really hope so. it'd be amazing.

pick two

1. had a nice nap today after my morning class and before my late afternoon meeting. that made me feel refreshed and ready for fun. 
2. went grocery shopping again for the fixin's for a quiche, black bean and corn salsa, and guacamole. yum!
3. had a fun night out with my friends. it was a hilarious and amazing night.

and, once again, i'm tired and going to bed. cool post, huh?

bar night.

1. jamming out to b.o.b. before going out with my girls! i need something fun to focus on tonight.
2. long day of classes today but they were pretty interesting and went quickly. 
3. went grocery shopping, killed two huge bugs (!), and did my italian homework. 

not feeling like blogging tonight. i just want to go out and have fun. then have one class, then weekend time!

italian?

1. long ass day today! gosh, i thought wednesday was supposed to be my easy day. GUESS NOT! i was on campus from 10 til 8. FML. i at least had a good workout.
2. my boyfriend landed safely and i heard from him a few times during the day. i realized that there is a limited time frame during which we can talk on most days...maybe this should have been obvious to me before but a six hour time difference is a pretty big bummer. 
3. four day weekend is fast approaching!!! i love labor day.

i need to stop procrastinating and get to work! i still have some reading for my 11:00 class that i have not yet finished. but it'll get read (some tonight and some tomorrow morning). i have decided, though, that i worry A LOT A LOT about things that probably don't need as much worrying. i worried about planes landing safely, i worried about dairy allergies, i worried about the gym, i worried about walking home alone. but in all reality, i also don't worry about a lot of things and just kind of live and let be. sometimes i'm a worry wart but others i'm a cool cucumber. speaking of cucumbers, i need to go grocery shopping tomorrow...

bye bye

1. today was a long, tough day. my classes were pretty interesting though and i had a dinner with friends and then frozen yogurt after! 
2. my boyfriend had some...traveling issues. passport? no go. but he's on a plane now and will hopefully land safely soon.
3. chopped champions tonight! it's a 5 part series featuring all of the returning champions competing again. the one who wins the first four shows competes in a final showdown among the four winners for $50,000.

goodbyes are hard. that's a given. but saying goodbye for five months and knowing that things could be totally different when saying hello again makes them even tougher. i know this will be a hard semester, that's another given. but i am also hoping to get a lot out of it academically, inter-personally, and personally. i will have more time to myself (even if i didn't want all that time to myself) and more time to think. so i need to occupy myself and my mind until i've started to manage my feelings and thoughts better. i am already wishing for spring 2011 but i also know that i need to take this semester one day at a time and make sure to keep living my life (just like my blog title suggests). because everyday, no matter how bad, is still a beautiful day (right...?).

ready for this movie to be over

1. my body is tired but my brain is not. gym workout today for the first time in a few weeks and also a long walk home. 
2. i think i am getting added to italian...that would be the ideal scenario. but it's still in the works. keep your fingers crossed!
3. watching the birth of a nation right now. it's a three hour movie about the civil war, reconstruction, and the ku klux klan based on the book "the clansman" by thomas dixon. shoot me now. 

long day today. long day tomorrow. i just want it to be the weekend again! but oh well, you don't always get what you want. i promise, i'll post a better post when i'm not watching this HORRIBLE movie. it's a silent film. three hours. but i'm going to my newest class tomorrow so we'll see how it goes!